My Life, My Way, No Need for Children

To preface this post with another, I have to say that the majority of this current post is based on the incredibly written post of Gala Darling.  To paraphrase the post, it was an advice post based on the most appropriate way to address the incivility or ignorance of people who question those who choose not to have children.

I too have that same problem, I come from a LARGE family on both sides: My father’s side contains 3 uncles and 3 aunts, 7 siblings total; My mother’s side contains 6 Uncles and 6 aunts, Technically it is 5 uncles since one has passed on, but you get the general idea.  When my grandfather on my mother’s side died back in 2001-ish, I cannot remember, He had over 32 Grandchildren (Including my brother, sister and I) and 15 Great-Grandchildren which has gotten exponentially greater since my teenage cousins have started reproducing.  While I do sound cynical in all of this, it is mostly based off the fact that I cannot go to any party, be it a wedding, Easter, or a Funeral without being bombarded by the question:

“When are you and Donald going to get married and have children?”

And the answer to marriage has always been the same, “When the finances come in and we can individually pay for the wedding, we’ll have one”–God forbid we’re living in sin! According to my Aunt– and to the children one: “We plan on not having children.”

The wedding one causes its own type of controversy but the child question always brings up the other argument: “You’re disappointing your parents.”

While I have been living a lifestyle contrary to what my parents have wanted for me, I have always been my own person, my mother has gotten used to the idea that I will not wear a thousand dollar wedding dress, or wear white (How bout bright lime green or bright Mauve!), or have the wedding in a church (I’m Agnostic and the boyfriend is Atheist–House of Blues Peacock Room Wedding All the Way with Amanda Palmer as the House Band!!!).  She has acknowledged that I like to wear makeup so bright that I blind people, and that I will never conform to her standards of what proper living should be, and I listen to Amanda Palmer who is not her idea of an idol.

She accepts me for all of these things, but the only problem we get into is Children.  She comes from a standpoint that everyone needs to procreate and have children, I on the other had believe that having children and teaching may cause me to go super-duper insane and somehow either get put away for insanity or burn my house down!  That and working retail 10+ years has shown me that I really have no patience for children at all, which is why I ended up becoming a High School Teacher, I may be raising children, at least they know how to potty in a toilet….at least I HOPE they do!  Not only that, my mother should know as well as I that having Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome is a shot in the dark that will either produce healthy children, or loose your ability to have them at all.  I decided not to try to have children based off the fact that I have seen what a hysterectomy has done to my mother, and not having children is the best way to avoid an unplanned hysterectomy in the first place.  She ended up with both PCOS and Endometriosis from having my brother, sister and I, and many of that was from her not having money to be checked by a proper gynecologist until after she had me, my brother and sister. I also realized that most of my problems at that time of the month imitate hers when she was my age, so from a medical standpoint I say no to children.

From my personal philosophy standpoint I also say no.  I have been a teacher for several years now, and I spend a great deal of time volunteering at my mother’s school with her first graders.  I’m known as “Maestra Mala” or “Mean Teacher” because I have little to no tolerance for 25+ small 7 year olds in a small room running around on a sugar bender after lunch.  I can barely stand my 4th period 10th grade class after lunch, but they know my rules, these small ones don’t, and it’s not my classroom, so I shut my mouth and make sure that they at least do not kill each other.

via sunilchaudhary.com

Children to me seem like a great idea for some, and a horrible idea for others, my boyfriend and I love children, we love playing with them, holding them, taking the for walks, and all that jazz, but as great parents we would probably make, the possibility of us having children are very slim, for medical and personal reasons.  We’re not grown-up enough to have children, having most of our doors in our room locked because of the fact we collect vintage action figures and religious artifacts, video games and movies, and the fact that we are self-proclaimed Ferret Parents who understand the possibilities and dangers of having infants/toddlers around ferrets at the same time.  Having one fluffy 2-year-old and a human 2-year-old in the same house is mental suicide!  Also, we prefer ferrets anyway, they rarely cry, they may get into everything, but after the 6 year mark, they have less of a chance to back talk to you than a human child.

My boyfriend and I are also realists though, we’ve been planning for the unknown possibilities for years now.  What happens if we end up conceiving, Abortion Yes, Abortion No? Adoption, Closed or Open? Or Keeping the child?  While both of us are Pro-Choice, neither of us would prefer the abortion option, we can barely put down our animals without feeling guilty, and its our mess we have to see it through to the end, but neither of us would want to send the child out for adoption (Our ferret was a foster case who ended up staying with us, full term pregnancy then adoption would be out of the question), so we decided that the option for us was to keep the future child, more because conception happened and lets take it to the extreme.  We’re reasonable people if a child happens through all the protection we’re taking, then obviously the child was meant to be with us.  The other thing too, we’re stubborn, and take challenges head on, and rarely back out of a fight.

The way we see it, we may want to be a childless couple but we’re adult enough to realize that this child is coming to a home that it will be loved and cherished.

To add more to this story, we’re also Guardians for our friend’s children as well…last time I counted 5 children are in our guardianship and most of this was because our friends recognize us as responsible adults who do love kids and will take care of them and love them, no questions asked.  I do not wish any ill will on our friends, but watch the boyfriend and I have 5 children who are not ours!

I do not question that sometimes accidents happen, but my plans are to where I want to get my PHD, I want to start teaching college, I want to work at the Sorbonne (If I can learn French), or work in the BAU of the FBI, there’s so many things I want in my life, that children are no where in sight for me at this time.  After my first novel hits it big on the big screen, and I win an Oscar for Acting and Screenwriting, MAAAYBE I’ll think about having children, till then, my choice my rules.  I even get questioned from my students about this, even ones who do have children,  and I always tell them, “My students are the only children I will ever need!”  If I could post the pictures on here, I have so many pictures of my students children, from their first picture to year three that I even get emails of 5 year olds with captions saying “Watch out Miss C, you’re getting another one of me VERRY SOON!”

My family has always been traditional, I have lived my life with nothing but being a non-traditionalist who prefers other things than most.  I look at my brother and sister and notice that they can do things with their lives in any which way they want, and I know my parents will always compare me to my brother and sister, but I live the way I want to live.  My parents love me enough to realize that children are really not my thing, and while I love playing with babies and babysitting, teaching those who wish not to be taught, and I know that I can go home and relax with a glass of wine without having to worry about another small person.  You should see the boyfriend when he’s in a toy store, I had to pull him away from two 10 year olds with Nerf guns because all three of them were in an all out Metal Gear Solid battle at FAO Schwartz with my boyfriend wearing a red bandanna and crawling on the ground!   Who says my boyfriend doesn’t like kids, he’s a big kid himself!  He even told me that if we do end up having children, he wants a little girl so she can be the meanest, toughest, girly tomboy around!  I laugh cause I know with our luck and Karma, our daughter would want to be in pageants and be the princess, not the awesome rock stars her parents are! 😀

via Anne Geddes

My other reasons are purely familial.  I come from a family who wishes to talk about sex as if it is nothing but taboo, which is why both sides of my family have teenagers becoming, or getting their girlfriends pregnant.  It’s not that it is taboo, but they’re too afraid to even talk about sex with each other, and I see the problems these unplanned pregnancies have on my cousins and their partners and their children involved.  I know the children are loved, but you can see it in their eyes that they did not want this for their lives, and I see that and I don’t want to become that.  The problem I also see is that my teenage cousins don’t even want to talk to their children about sex either, and take the stance “They need to learn it themselves” but in my view that causes more problems than solves.  If each of us takes the time to sit down with our children, and talk about the options that are out there, then maybe we’ll have fewer people regretting having children.   I never got those options with my parents being conservative liberals, but they are starting to realize that I may not have that motherhood instinct, and animals are the best way for me to go, but they won’t realize it until they see it.

What gets me is that people start going on about how I am a horrible person for not wanting children. I am not a horrible person, I am just a person who sees her life and her options far better than many who don’t want children, or who do.  I spent years looking at my family to realize that I am in no way fit to be a mother.  Maybe my family scarred me from every being a mom, maybe I looked too hard, but I see those eyes, those zombie eyes of family members who used to be just like me, tell me I’m missing out when I know they’re miserable.  I see my family taking their aggression out on their children, those who are fat, need braces, or are told that they are ugly as sin and won’t do anything to help them feel better about themselves, yet I am the one who gets told that I am selfish.  I’m not, and I don’t appreciate being called that when I have your children coming to me for advice, because they are cutting themselves because my cousins are telling them that they’re ugly, or are getting drunk every-night blaming the kids on their horribly misshapen bodies.  I get told things that they are too ashamed to tell their parents, because I do not judge, yell or question their motives, I listen.  I get asked about sex all the time from my teenage second-cousins because all they get from their parents is “Don’t Do It.”   Those with worse problems, I take them to their school guidance counselor, or email the counselor myself, and have some one on one with a professional who can help them.  I’m also the person who tells them that they are the most beautiful things in the world, that maybe they were not planned but there are people who do love them, and if things do get bad, Cousin Oracle is not that far away and will come pick you up.  I see and do all this and yet I am told by these same transgressors that I am selfish, or fat.

I in no way want to discourage people from not having children, these are only my opinions, and yet not many people realize that NOT having a child is an option.  I have yet to meet a childless couple who did feel lonely or that their life was incomplete, my boyfriend and I feel very fulfilled in our lives as we strive to create a lifestyle for ourselves.  You don’t have to have a child just to keep a husband, I like referencing Drop Dead Fred when someone tells me this, even though it is fiction, I do see in real life what some people do to their children when they realize that they had a child just to keep a husband, they’re in a loveless relationship, too afraid to divorce because of familial standards, and the fact that they don’t want to raise a child alone.  Societal pressure is also filled with the ideology that we as women HAVE to get married at a young age, HAVE to have children, and be happy from it.  We all have choices, if you don’t want children, then don’t have any, or if you try to picture yourself having children, and all you see are dogs and ferrets, then don’t have children, but…

always keep your mind open and start thinking of the options you do have, planning always helps, but never assume that having children will be easy, it is a constant struggle, just like it is a constant struggle in getting my ferrets to potty in the litter box and not on the floor.

Looking back at my teenage cousins and their children and their relationships right now, I noticed that they are not happy, I even have a cousin whose girlfriend is leaving him behind with their two sons, because she cannot take the life of a mother, and has come out saying that she only got pregnant to keep him from having another girlfriend in college.  I don’t even know what to say about this, since I have never felt that insecure about someone to the extent of wanting children.  I don’t even know if I could leave my kids behind, but since men do it all the time, why not women, maybe with women leaving their families, a dialogue of whether or not having children can come up without all of us looking like selfish people.  I’m not a selfish person, I do spend time at Women and Children shelters helping out, I do spend time fostering animals, and having the neighborhood kids coming to help, educating them about the responsibilities of having animals.

The plain simple truth is, I like kids, I just don’t want any of my own.

Dreamers, what are your choices regarding Children, do you want any, not want any, what kind of plans do you have set?

Regards,

The Childless Oracle of Dreams

P.S. I got some really great articles from Gala Darling’s page that opened my eyes into doing this post.

I Cannot Handle Being A Mother Anymore

ChildFree Blog

Life

Dreamers,

While I try to be cheery in these posts, the past couple of days has been completely horrible.  I just found out that I have to put my cat down due to a serious illness.  I’m not in the best of shape, and I may not post for several days depending on how I take the situation.  We set the date for Thursday, and I may not post on Friday, I haven’t been in the writing mood for a while. My family and I are spending our last few days with my cat and we’re having the doctor come to our house to put her down in a comfortable and familiar place.

As I write this, I’m crying, it won’t stop and I’ve had to miss school on Monday because I was just in shock from the news.  I have raised her since she was a baby, we found her in a ditch with her two brothers and sister after a major storm.  Her sister drowned, and her and her brothers were covered in fleas and ants, all of them several days old. 

My cat is 12 years old now, who had social problems with people and isolated herself for 6 years in my parents bedroom.  She was fine until her cancer came back and started effecting her blood stream.   I have another cat, but its hard loosing one you’ve had forever, even though my other cat is like my child, it hurts way too much that this one is going.  I may even skip my Retro Thursday movie since I’m feeling horrible, and I may not be in the best mood.  I haven’t even seen the boyfriend since last Saturday morning, and I may not see him this weekend, I’m really sorry for the depressed mood this post is bringing, but its hard losing a pet that you have grown so close to.  I can’t even teach the students without wanting to cry.  I hope I’ll be better, but this is just a warning if you come by and see that I’m not around.

Regards,

The Depressed and Grieving Oracle of Dreams

Scream 4 – The Ultimate Sequel?

Scream, 1996

Scream 4, Review TBA

Scream was one of those movies, back in Junior High and High School, that changed the way the social norm looked at horror movies.  Every kid when I was in Junior High had always asked me about whether or not I had liked Scream.  Considering the fact that I had never seen Scream until my 7th grade year, after my parents had forbidden me to ever see the movie, I was considered a loser.  But there was something about Scream that permeated the social norms of my junior high school.  Everyone was talking about it, the scary movie was not just for those creepy metal heads, or the weirdos with the giant notebooks in front of their pants, it was something that all students of different social structures could appreciate. 

Not only that, but it revolutionized the way teenaged girls spent their sleepover nights.  I remembered that the first time I had ever seen Scream, was at a friend’s birthday sleepover where my friends forced me to watch the movie, and we spent the night screaming at the different scary scenes and ignored the rest and scarfed down popcorn, pizza and cheese whiz on crackers.  Ah the 90’s. Did I mention I graduated high school in 2002?

Anyway, after Scream premiered in 1996, it became a horror movie legend, and brought my attention to the ever still lovely, Rose McGowan.  No matter what that woman does, I cannot break this crush I have on her.  Damn you Charmed!!  Scream also pointed me into the direction of movie watching for more than just pleasure.  When they started going through the rules of scary movies, I had no clue as to what they were talking about, and I personally felt like a horror movie buff. So I spent MONTHS watching movies such as Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street, and The Shinning (before I knew it was a book), and looked for those elements in these movies.  It made for some enjoyable times, but it also gave me a sense as to what stipulated a good and bad movie.  Before then, I was that normal kid who thought every movie that came out was a good movie…my how times have changed!

Scream 2, 1997

Now fast forward 15 years, new strange horror flicks have come out, they have been either a hit or a miss, and the Scream franchise was awarded with 2 more films.  For some reason, I remember the 2nd Scream more than the 3rd…hmm.  Since the last movie, many Scream fans had been ravenous for a new Scream movie, more than likely one that would redeem the franchise after the third movie, and finally Wes Craven had agreed to make a new movie several years ago.  But what was interesting…The Rules have Changed!

Scream 4, 2011

The movie starts off with Sidney Prescott as an adult, on a book tour for her new book “Out of Darkness” based on how she was no longer a victim from the murders that have plagued her for most of her life.  The book tour ends right where it all started Woodsboro, and just in time too, because the killings have started…again. Dum DUN DUUUUMMMM!

The movie revolves around Sidney and her cousin Jill Roberts (Emma Roberts) and Jill’s friends (with hair fiasco Hayden Panettiere).  While I won’t divulge much into the film since a lot of what I’m going to say in a few minutes WILL be Spoilers (I will note this), I have a few things to say.

While the original characters of the franchise did comeback as were their actors Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox, David Arquette, and Roger Jackson as THE VOICE, to me, that is where most of the movie began and ended.  I’d be lying if I told you that I did not enjoy the movie.  For the most part it was an enjoyable movie, with moments that far exceeded my expectations.  The boyfriend and I spent most of the movie trying to figure out who was the killer, and their accomplice (as per Scream 1).   We also spent the time mocking the flick in true Scream fashion, and jotted down horror movie rules that the movie had broken…all of the originals as of Scream 1.

The movie lacked a cohesive storyline, there were too many B characters that added to the comic relief, and Dewey was among them.  The storyline perpetuated the idea of Rebecca Black (More of that in Spoilers),  and had a moral that pretty much is a spoiler within itself.

So, for more clarification:

Spoiler Alert!

The movie began with a horrible beginning, watching sequel, after sequel of the Stab franchise, in all its glory, the only good part about it, was watching Veronica Mars (Kristen Bell) stab Sookie Stackhouse (Anna Paquin) in the stomach.  Other than that, it was repetitive and annoying.

Scream Screenshot

Now when we establish the fact that we are in the real world, relatively real considering we’re watching a movie, and the first two are killed, we begin to realize that hey! this person or persons are remaking the original Woodsboro killings. 

Fast forward to the end, everyone is second guessing who the killers really are, and of course, one of the killers is a creepy horror movie buff, but the second was by far the most surprising.  Jill Roberts, Sidney Prescott’s cousin, was the second killer.  And for the most surprising shock of all, she wanted to be more famous than her cousin with whom she was compared to for most of her life.  Poor little Jill, no one likes you because you have a cousin who has people killed around her.  Now that the rules have changed, and its a sequel in a different time period, the killer HAS to be recording all of the killings to put on the web, that way they have the movie already made and there is no need for them to make a new film.

Now what was even more shocking, was the fact that Jill Roberts, started going on and on about how she was never going to be second-rate, and how becoming famous now requires no work at all.  Graduating high school, going to college, and all that work are no longer relevant in today’s society, when all you need is to have a kitschy way to gain viewers – think Rebecca Black, especially being the sole survivor of a horrible murder spree that involved Sidney Prescott.  Great cross-section of what I have to deal with at school.  The students don’t want to work, because they want to become famous, they don’t need an education anymore, and with success stories like Rebecca Black, Jersey Shore and others, they are more seduced into the idea that having a scandalous video and becoming famous is better than working…hmm.

Unfabulous

But the overall theme of the movie is one that Wes Craven has been fighting since The Hills Have Eyes.  Don’t mess with the Original, they will always be better, and writer Kevin Williamson also stated that fact.  And it is true, read Point #3.

What was most disturbing was seeing Emma Roberts, the sweet unpopular girl from Nickelodeon’s Unfabulous, shoot some guy in the jewels just to prove a point that she is not a girl who gets cheated on, and seduce the nerdy dude to do her bidding.  Scaaary!

End Spoiler Alert

Now while the reviews seem negative in context, my movie going experience at Scream 4 was a negative one.  The dude next to us was texting for the most part, and neglected to turn off his phone, so Sexy Back was blaring during the movie.  People down the aisle from us were kicked out for talking on their phones the entire movie, people farther down front were laughing/screaming/talking through the movie.  The dude texting had his girlfriend sit next to the boyfriend and I, and spent the entire movie yelling “You’re not serious” at EVERY major plot hole and turning point to where the boyfriend and I were gonna stab her with the provided silverware.

In all, I did enjoy the movie, but I can not truly give a cohesive review until I’ve seen the movie undisturbed…possibly Friday during the day when kids are not out and about.

Regards,

The Not so Scary Oracle of Dreams

Houston is No Longer Relevant

Being a Houstonian, I have prided myself being a resident of a famous Space City, but the recent decision for us not to receive a Space Shuttle has actually caused me to think about the decisions made regarding these decisions.  For one thing, I can understand why we lost the bid for the Summer Olympics, we’re just not set up feasibly for a giant world-wide sports centered event.  But the Space Shuttles!?!?!  Seriously, how did we lose on that count? Come on people, how can you ignore the phrases that have graced pop culture for years.  So this post is dedicated to the men and women who helped make space exploration possible.

Houston, The Eagle has landed!

 

Who could forget (well, I could since I wasn’t born at this time) on July 20th, 1969 at 3:17 pm EST, with the whole watching on their television screens, Neil Armstrong came on the radio to signify to Houston, the Eagle has landed on the moon.  Several minuets later, he came on again and with the whole world watching he stated:

“That’s one small step for man; One giant leap for Mankind.” – Neil Armstrong

This was the largest event in human history since the launching of the Atomic bomb in 1945, man had finally reached the moon, placing the phrase “Houston, The Eagle has landed” into pop culture, having the phrase used in many different situations in modern pop tv shows and movies.  Who could ignore these amazing words….

Houston, We Have a Problem…

 

While I do acknowledge the fact that the original phrase states: “Houston, we’ve had a problem here.” I will not doubt the impact this phrase has on pop culture society.  On April 13, 1970, the Apollo 13 crew (ironically) reported to base here in Houston, Texas about an oxygen tank explosion.  The explosion hindered the crews supply towards water and oxygen and cut down the electricity.  Turning off any non-essential items, the crew patiently traveled four more days around the moon, and made a watery landing all three Astronauts were safe. The phrase gained notoriety in pop culture because of its timeless phrasing.  This phrase could be used in many different situations, problems, and just to be plain funny.

In my last obsessive rant about this situation, I really have no clue as to why New York and California were given the space shuttles, aside from the fact that the shuttles are in large urban populated areas with more foot traffic.  But why ignore Houston, or for that matter the entire mid west, why does the East and West coast have to have all the cool stuff.  Not only that, but from an educator stand point, how can we sit here and teach to these kids the importance the space program had when WE were denied the possibilities of ever having a space shuttle…Good move voters!

The Orbitally obsessed, Oracle of Dreams

My Week 4/4 – 4/8

This week has been somewhat boring since it was just me trying to save money and wait for my paycheck in the coming week. 

Cost’s Plus World Market, Llamas, Fortune Telling…

I haven’t been able to venture out much in the past week, except for saturday when my boyfriend and I went to Jason’s Deli for a lunch meal, and encounted the cutest little animal this side of the world.

It was an adorable Llama that was made in Peru at Cost’s Plus World Market.  I fell in love with it, but had no money to purchase him…sigh!  Not only that, but the boyfriend and I found this book called Fourtune Telling Book of Names, the sad part about this book…

Fortune Telling Book of Names

It did not have alot of common names, and it was weird, it gave you a fortune for your life based off your name…interesting….We entertained ourselves for a while and played around with the numerology section of the book, and then left for a barbecue my friend was holding.

I’ll leave you with this week’s D’oh!

D’oh! for 4/4 – 4/8

Again, I was watching another teacher’s class who had a meeting to attend, and this time a Junior U.S. History class, the Junior’s use computers for the majority of their ciriculum, and in that class they were supposed to be working on an internet activity.  Well, then the joke started:

“Robert likes little boys.” started the Google Translator, over the quiet din of the classroom.  Everyone in class started laughing.

It was hard to keep the class under control after that first incident and several started afterwards…then the printer came up….

Here’s a list of papers that was printed in the span of 5 minutes:

Robert Likes Little Boys

Herman likes grown men. Herman likes grown men. Herman likes grown men. Herman likes grown men. Herman likes grown men. Herman likes grown men.

I knew a guy who knew a guy, who knew a guy, who knew a guy, who knew a guy, who knew a guy, who knew a guy, who knew a guy, who saw Robert make whoopee with another guy in the kitchen and he liked it.

Robert Likes Grown Men

Starring: Little Boys

By: Robert

The frustrating part is that I didn’t know where the kill switch for the printer was and whether or not shutting the printer off would be beneficial to the wireless in the school. Sadly I wasn’t able to do anything, but came with a better story afterwards.

An Open Letter to the Movie Industry

To the Owners of Major Movie Companies:

As an avid movie goer and a general movie buff, I have several grievances towards the state of the movies at hand.  As well as several solutions to the problems.  Yes, I would also like to acknowledge that I do not represent everyone in the world, nor my American patriots, I do not also represent the solutions as a quick easy way to save the movie industry, I’m just making some observations about the state of movies in this world.  I do not expect you to take my words seriously, or take them as final solutions to the problems.  These are only grievances in which I know will never be solved until the Movie Industry can get their act together.  These are to be taken in stride and hopefully turn a few heads.  I would also like to acknowledge that my movie going experience had dwindled in the past several years, due to most of these grievances, and I have only been coming back to see movies because the venue I like to attend (also because of the ages 18+ attendance after 7 p.m.) has screenings of Retro Movies that I do enjoy watching.  So please, if you do care, heed my notes, or just laugh at me mercilessly, take your pick.

Battle L.A. - Movie Don't

1. Please stop making films targeted at specific audiences!

I do acknowledge the fact that movies are made with the intended purpose of targeting a specific age group with in their films. To start, I do not oppose the creation of films geared towards children since most of those are great classics like Toy Story, How to Tame Your Dragon, and the recent Despicable Me.  But my grievance lies in the fact that the “it” thing at the moment is gearing movies toward the Tween/Teen crowed and creating movies that have either no substance, or completely ignore the fact that we people, even as teenagers, do have a brain.  While I do understand marketing ploys, and their relentless assault to our senses in our everyday lives, I just hate being lied to.  If it’s a bad movie, say it’s a bad movie and that you just want our money to support a project that will be ten times better than thistripe.  While I know this may not happen, I am a sucker for some of those bad movies, remember Clash of the Titans, the Harry Hamlin version anyone? After my disastrous viewing of Battle of L.A. I felt an underwhelming sensation that our money was more important than our entertainment, and if I’m living in a free market economy, I should pay for quality and not stupidity, and while I acknowledge that the only thing movie execs do care about is our money, why worry about quality.  Who cares that a good majority of Stephen Spielberg and Michael Bay movies have some serious plot holes in them, or that

Juno – Movie Do

they just plain don’t make sense (Lets not complain about Indiana Jones though since that franchise goes with that last statement about guilty pleasures). As long as they’re getting our money, the movie execs will market to whomever they choose.  I don’t fully oppose the gearing towards a teenage market, I just hate that I have to swim through the mess to get to the quality stuff (or just go Indie and be done with it) and then realize that it is in only select theaters.  If you’re gonna do a teen movie, please at least make one quality adult movie to go along with it.

What I’d like to see?
I will still accept the same old design, but please start making movies geared toward adults that don’t have a sappy love story, or an ill planed comedy, but something that has been thought out, taken time to write, not filler until summer time comes along.  Look outside the box for good adult themes without the tired use of Teen Heartthrobs.  I know you’re trying to tap into that Un-Taxed section of teen money, but at least try to create an adult movie with depth without resorting to teen stardom. Example: Juno.

I Am Number 4 - Movie Don't

2. Stop undermining the audience’s intelligence!

Ok, this is a bit of a problem for me, I go to see a movie that I think is good, and then I realize, “Holy Crap, what the hell happened!”  As an example, I’ll use Battle of L.A. I’m a huge paranormal, alien, cryptozoological and true crime buff.  When I heard that they were going to make a movie about what happened in L.A. in 1942, I was freaked, and they were using the alien conspiracy theory!  Awesome!  I was a bit upset that they made it into an action flick, but I was ok with that, you can’t win all of them, and then I saw the movie.  I have never, ever walked out of a movie that I wasn’t pleased with EVER! and this was the first.  It was poorly planned, timed, edited, written, cast, and everything just plain sucked!  I could have written better tripe than that, and I have tried though the script was not bought, but the problem being is that, with careful planning, executing and teaser trailers, around the internet, tv, radio and on billboards, there was no way you could have not  wanted to see this movie.  It showed promise, it showed prestige, and I ignored my number 1 movie rule: Never see a movie 1st week out! (I ignored that again with Insidious but with better results).  I tend to wait, filter through viewer reviews (some specific names which I will not mention) and see if it is worth my time.  I just hate movies that speak the obvious and never let the audience figure it out, I hate movies that try to get a very abstract concept out in film and fail horribly (I’m a teacher teaching history and I can still explain the anger Japan, Italy and Germany felt after WWI and why it pushed the world towards WWII with more success than movies).

Another example of fail was the more recent, I Am Number 4, while I love me some Glee and I wanted to watch this for Diana Aragon, I couldn’t even bring myself to finish the movie, and ended up balancing my checking account on my phone for the rest of the movie (I was with my family and they seemed to like it).  The idea on whole was good, but it brings me back to the first point about marketing towards teens (I should have realized when a Glee cast member was a main star), and the fact it followed the same storyline as Twilight:

Cute guy moves/lives in town and dates no girls.  Sexy and mousey girl lives/moves into town and finds out that she’s artsy/intelligent to the point of being a social outcast.  THe cute guy takes a shine to girl and they start dating where they find out that he is a vampire/werewolf/alien/serial killer.  Romance ensues, girl does something stupid and guy comes to the rescue and blames himself for the problem she started, leaves

The Breakfast Club - Movie Do

her, then realizes he can’t live without her and comes back, happiness ensues, horrible final act and ending love scene walking away happy.

If you’re going to follow that paradigm more, I think I’m just going to leave now and vomit later!

What I’d like to see?

A bit more depth in the movies, try to say what is going on without losing a lot of the story, mystery can be a good thing.  Don’t go too overboard with the mystery because we end up having a whole Darkness good-movie-until-the-end-when-they-can’t-explain-anything movie!  Try not to assume members of the audience will not get the idea, try to make us think for once, don’t overwhelm us with visual effects, or 3D, we want substance! Example: The Breakfast Club, Did they do it? Did they not?

Catwoman – Movie Don’t

3. Stop making movies from books/video games/tv/old movies/sequels.

While I’m one for good movies that are great from books (One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, The Polar Express, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (Gene Wilder Movie), Dr. Strangelove, Stand By Me, Silence of the Lambs, No Country for Old Men, Stephen King Films with the exception of The Shinning remake, again any personal favorites?), video games (Advent Children, Tomb Raider, Resident Evil Franchise, though people would argue with me on that one), tv (Naked Gun, Wrath of Kahn, South Park The Movie, Get Smart, Addams Family Values, Serenity, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but again people will argue with me on that), old movies (3:10 to Yuma, Dawn of the Dead, Ocean’s Eleven, The Italian Job, Cape Fear, True Grit Need I say more?) and sequels (Addams Family Values do not argue with me on this one, it had more substance than the first and other sequels out there…ok Aliens, Terminator 2, Dawn of the Dead, Wrath of Kahn (Only star trek film I liked!!), Empire Strikes Back, The God Father Part II, Dark Knight (rip Heath Ledger), Silence of the Lambs (betcha didn’t know that was a sequel!)).  There are good remakes out there, but how many have been made since 2000? 8 out of that entire list.

So what does that mean? maybe we’ve lost the drive to create quality and ended up going with how much can we milk out of this story.  Example: the Twilight Sagas.  Granted I did like the books, but I’ve been reading bad vampire romance novels for years, but when the movies came out, and saw how much content they left out, or interpreted horribly (In my vision the vampires sparkled like diamonds, as if they were made of molten diamond under their skin, not sister’s body glitter).  But that didn’t stop there, lets see how much we can market off of Twilight crap, shirts, hats, jewelry, makeup, body glitter, shoes, bags, lunch kits, water bottles, need I go on????  The whole movies from books/games/tv/old movies/sequels all started with one question: “How can we market this item to maximize the amount of money we get?”

Every movie remade from a different medium all started with that question and the bottom line: Money.  But there are some people who look at the movie and start thinking of ways to make it better.  Hey look, Silence of the Lambs and Dark Knight got Oscar Nods and Wins so sequels can’t be all that bad!  The thing is, we a put into a mentality to become obsessive over a video game, book, tv show, and we allow it to grow bigger and by the time the movie comes out, we’re foaming at the mouth for the chance to see it, we’d rather skip on quality so we at least have the chance to see the movie.  Hey! We’re not all like the fans of Mega Man who actually donated money to get this movie going.  But there has to be a credence to what we see.

Silence of the Lambs - Movie Do

What I’d like to see?

You can keep making these movies, ONLY if you take the time to write out a script that is actually reasonable and want to see yourself.  Don’t sit here and shell out script after script in order to capitalize on the name itself.  Remakes are a touchy subject, because of the old adage, “If it’s not broke, don’t fix it.”  Now, if it was a horribly done movie and the funds nor technology were not available for this movie to be made at the time, then by all means, go a head and remake it, JUST USE GOOD SPECIAL EFFECTS AND WRITE A BETTER SCRIPT!  You can fix old movies, but I think Clash of the Titans was meant to be bad no matter what.  Also, please do not follow a fad, I am just sick of seeing Twilight (remember I work in a highschool) everywhere I go, and with the new movie coming out, I think I’m going to sleep that night and hope that they get through the next two movies with little to no fanfare at all, and I hope that this last installment of Harry Potter will be the best one yet…I can still hope right????? Example: Silence of the Lambs

Matrix Reloaded - Movie Don't

4. I came to see a movie not a video game!!!

Ok, so I have to give an example to this and a statement that may shock you readers.  The first ever movie I saw where I could not stand the CGI was The Matrix 2.  Props to the Cohen brothers for creating a great concept the problem is…I hated The Matrix series, and by hate, I mean all three!  The first one, revolutionizing as it was, was just a rehash of old archetypes and no substance.  I could not stand it, and what made it worse was that I was forced to go see all three movies because my boyfriend at the time LOVED THEM.  Ha! Jokes on him looser!  Anyway, when I saw the second installment of The Matrix, it was the first movie I watched where I wanted my money back.   Granted I knew I would be seeing a movie with great special effects and such, what I wasn’t expecting was a computer game looming at me of Neo and Agent Smith to be totally comprised of computer animation.  Yes, that scene may have been taxing, but its called green screening and using that damn program Lord of the Rings used for mass fighting.  Aside from that, I was angry I spent my good earned cash on a video game and not a movie. The second time I was watching a movie that I felt that way was the Eric Bana version of The Hulk.  Dear sweet god I nearly died.

I’m a pro technologists, I like technology, but dear sweet god, please do not bombard me with CGI it’s absolutely unnerving!  I like the computer generated movies of Pixar and Dreamworks, but please live action films do not bombard me with crazy technology.  I know films like Avatar the necessity to have CGIed people was a necessity, that’s fine, since the Na’vi were doing some serious crazy stunts, but please don’t put CGI into a live action movie that doesn’t need CGI.  Example, as horrible as a remake the Nightmare on Elm Street was, it was absolutely unnecessary to have Rorschach be completely CGIed into the movie when Robert England had played Freddie for years and didn’t need a single computer generated pixel placed into his Freddie.  Not only that, what happened with the Jim Henson Company??  Those guys were awesome at creating believable creatures turned human, remember the original Ninja Turtles anyone???

Terminator 2 - Movie Do

Whatever happened to the usage of puppetry, and sideshow mechanics to create a film.  Yes, CGI is the new norm, but years from now, when we’ve created serious realistic looking people, the CGI of now will looked dated and old.  remember ever watching Little Giants where the sick kid had that giant snot bubble growing from his nose.  Back then it looked real, now it looks dated and aged and unrealistic.

What I’d like to see?

Less CGI and more substance, with the money spent on CGI, you could have better spent in hiring good writers.  Back to point #2, don’t assume all movie going aficionados will be glamorized by the glittery special effects created that you want them to see so you hope they’d ignore the terribly plot whole strewn script you’re putting off as good.   Please, if it is cheaper using cheesecloth, and puppets, by all means use them, we at the box office trying to buy tickets will be extremely grateful. Example: Terminator 2

Clash of the Titans - Movie Don't

5. Please use 3D as an enhancement, not a cover for a bad movie.

Some may not remember the usage of 3D back in the 50’s for their B-Horror Movies (Think the beginning of Thriller), but now more than ever, we’re bombarded with “In 3D” for almost every movie out there now.  While I do enjoy the new 3D movies that are out there but I like them within reason.  Example, Despicable Me, How to Tame Your Dragon, Coraline, Monsters vs. Aliens, etc. were all great films that were made specifically for 3D but they used that just enough to where if you did not watch the movie in 3D you were not missing anything.  But now, it seems that all these movies are contained in this mentality that if we add 3D to the end of the film, knowing the film has no use for the movie, knowing it is a bad film, they just add in 3D as an afterthought, knowing that we’ll pay the extra $3-4 to see the movie in 3D.  Case in point: Jackass 3D.  Not only that, but the cost for those glasses are ridiculous, and we recycle them at the end?  Why can’t we get a refund on the glasses if we recycle them?  It seems wasteful of my $3-4 that I spend only to recycle the darn glasses.  And I know I’m not the only one.  At my dentist office in a very old issue of Entertainment, there’s an

Avatar - Movie Do

article in there showing that I”m not the only one who feels the same way about 3D.

What I’d like to see?

Responsible use for 3D, make a film that uses, or enhances the experience in 3D (Avatar is a good example), but please don’t make it to where every movie is now in 3D or put 3D in as an afterthought.  Placing it as an afterthought only cheapens the experience of 3D and the extra costs only prompt me to see the movie without the 3D experience and wait for my next trip to Disney to see Lilo and Stich the ride in 3D. Also please make 3D glasses for those people who wear glasses, the worst part is going to see a movie and not able to see it very well because of the glasses on top of your glasses. Example: Avatar

Transformers 2 - Movie Don't

6. Please stop making expensive movies to where we at the ticket booth have to pay for it?

I think this is where the movie industry is hurting.  With the advent of internet, people with video cameras in the theater, and the fact that ticket prices are too high, more and more companies are creating more and more expensive movies for us to see.  Just the price alone of ticket sales are going  up to set off the amount of money that the industry is demanding for the movie.  I too have been searching for tickets that are $8 and less here in Houston, and I’m starting to attend venues that offer alcoholic drinks, and food as opposed to the concession stand of junk.  That’s another thing, if you insist on ripping us off Theater Owners, please for the love of God make ticket prices cheaper, and then proceed to charge me $3.50 for a pickle I can get from a corner store for a third of that price.  Not only that, if you did lower the price of the movie, and worked the same system you have been working for years, your profit margin would be exponential and we’d be happier down here for the less amount of money,

Paranormal Activity - Movie Do

but please do not lose quality.  Example, Paranormal Activity, here is a movie that was made on a small budget of about $15,000 and with tip-top marketing in the form of Facebook and other social medias, the movie ended up grossing approximately $107,917,283.  So it is possible to make a blockbuster on a very small budget, instead of spending millions and expecting the ticket payers to pay the slack on overpriced tickets.

What I’d like to see?

I really can’t give an explanation but greed, and that’s that.  We can’t get lower ticket prices unless we all stop watching movies, but with the aforementioned problems above, there will not be any change unless we make it happen.  But alas that may never happen with the “It” movies coming out at once. Example: Paranormal Activity

I’m not expecting anyone to do anything, these are just grievances that I felt needed to be addressed after watching a horrible film based on the lives of L.A. citizens fighting against aliens, I was just horribly disappointed in society, and the industry as a whole.  In the past four months I have only spent ticket money on one new movie and that was Insidious, the other money I have spent has been on movies that I’ve already seen but not in theaters.  Retro Movie Night where I know I’ll be disappointed but not without laughing.

Got any other grievances about the state of movies? Got other examples to add? Pissed at what I said? Comment below.

The Oracle of Dreams

Trust the Insidious…

Insidious, 2010 5 out of 5

Insidious

Insidious starts of with a set of parents who moved into a new home, I know most of you are thinking “Hey, that’s every scary movie out there, whats so crazy about that!” and that is when this movie takes off in a whole new perspective.  Yes, the family moves into a new home with their two older boys and their baby daughter, but it’s really not the house you focus on, but the family dynamic, and the fact that their son falls into a coma from what appears to be a bad fall, but it really isn’t.  At the beginning of the movie, the family is strong, like most archetypes in these films and you see that dynamic waver and crush as the movie progresses and in one swooping moment the family is together again, no questions asked, as if the past several months never existed.  Again, that is and is not present in this film.

To me, the writers of this film were trying to get rid of the archetypes that plague the horror genre for years now, and I’m not just talking about teenagers who have sex, I’m talking about the whole genre itself.  Now where this movie really had me going was the fact that they used suspense to build upon the audience’s localized fear, and use the fact that the audience is in a dark room surrounded by people whom they do not know as that catalyst.  The suspense in this film was amazing, at one point you’re staring [SPOILER ALERT] at a woman who is not moving, and the music is building with the great crescendo of strings and then BOOM, the woman blinks, startling everyone in the room, some girls scream and others start to laugh at the fact that they were startled by eye blinking[END SPOILER] and the feeling is that the whole world is falling apart.  Not only that, but the director used the element of surprise in the film and for the most part, those are the moments that are ingrained in my mind as we speak, and what has prevented me from sleep for the past couple of days!  Not only that, but the suspense building set my nerves on edge to the point that my true phobia of clowns came out and the clown marionettes in the movie set of a panic attack, because I had images of the clowns strangling the son out of life.  Yes, it did that to me.  Not only that, but my fear of the dark prevents me from even seeing certain scary movies in the dark, and like Paranormal Activity, Descent and Poltergeist I have to watch these films in full light or I’ll be a nervous wreck.

I won’t go into many of the sordid details but that for those who doubt this movie’s credence because of its PG-13 rating, you are sorely mistaken, a good horror film shouldn’t be about the gore and violence, but about suspense, hacking into that deep unreachable area of our mind where there is still that primal fear of the dark, of death, and of not knowing.  SO yes, for a PG-13 film, this movie does not disappoint, and puts itself among the other great movies of that rating like Poltergeist.

The never-scares-easy boyfriend even was scared at the end of this film, and neither of us have had that effect since we watched Descent more because we both have a fear of confined spaces and we needed some “Room to breathe” so to speak, but Insidious doesn’t give you that break.  The directors take art direction to a whole new platform with this movie, and in order to fully appreciate the direction of this film you have to be looking AWAY from the main action at hand and look at what is behind these people, the opening credits help prepare the audience with this idea, and for horror movie junkies, this is a “HEY LOOK BEHIND THE ACTORS” sign for the majority of the movie.

The story line does falter towards the end, and even before the end of the movie, the boyfriend and I had an idea on what would happen but again, it was foreseeable but the afterthought in it didn’t seem as likely.  I can see why this movie may not be favored among horror enthusiasts, but I sure did love it, and so did the boyfriend when it came to this movie.  I completely give it a great recommendation and a 5/5 rating for the movie.

One last thing, I will never hear “Tip-toe Through the Tulips” the same ever again!

 

Regards,
The Incredibly Sleep Deprived Oracle of Dreams