Sorry for the delay…

I’m sorry I’ve been M.I.A. on the blog for a couple of weeks, it’s been hectic here in Oracle-land dealing with my sister’s wedding, school applications, and program and invitation designs.  Not only that, I’ve been teaching myself graphic design from some  I’m also trying to wait for my Sub-check to come in for me to buy a new book for my Paranormal Library series.  I have one I’ve been reading, but it’s just way too much information in a small package that I already know, so its been agonizing, but a great read nonetheless.  Also, I may post a complementary review on one of the books I have already written about.

Anyway, to pass the time before I post the last of my images from my 30 Photography Challenge and A Paranormal Library, I am going to post some of the most inspiring things I have found over the internet with LINKS!!!

  • I’ve been frequenting A Beautiful Messfor quite some time now, and here are some very inspiring D.I.Y. projects and crafts I have discovered since I’ve been reading about the work from Elsie and her crew!
    • I love this wall art made from paint swatches!  Believe it or not, I have a bunch of these guys in a drawer in my room!!
    • I keep going back to this Record Cabinet.  I have some ideas to use this as an impromptu jewelry supply and mini sewing machine storage!
    • Elsie had a sewing class on her blog, great for me since I have a new sewing machine to try out!  If you’re a newbie like me, try this Simple Cotton Top!
    • If my hair would cooperate, I would so do this hair style!
  • Pugly Pixel is a great resource for Photoshop items, and I find her blog highly inspiring for my artwork and blog!
    • These Handmade Envelopes inspired me to create and write a blog post on my sister’s Save the Date cards!
    • You can learn how to make your own Blog Post Layout!
    • There are also some downloadable’s for free or for those who are part of her membership (with a fee).
  • Of course there’s NubbyTwiglet who posts design advice in links loved and such for those who love graphic design or shoes.

Check out this Cosmopolitan, Las Vegas commercial, every time it comes on, I start dancing!!!

Isn’t that song is amazing!?!  Then check out Parov Stelar’s website and watch this awesome video..

That is it for me, till next time!!!

I know I haven’t been around lately….

Sorry for the many month delay on my blog, I’ve been very busy with two-jobs, a boyfriend that needs attention, and an increasing depression that won’t go away. So I’ve decided that I need to be constructive, and get my little ass in gear!

New Year’s Resolution!!!

    1. Lose Weight:  I know, I know, I know, that’s EVERYONE’s Resolution, but for me this is a must!  My sister’s wedding is in May, and we have SO MUCH to do that it is overwhelming the entire family.  Each of us has our own problems to worry about and I know that for all three of us, our Lets-lose-our-lazy-weight is on that list of worry.  Right now, I have my sights set on this beautiful wrapped dress from Alfred Angelo, but I’m still hoping to find a pretty vintage dress for me to use in the Wedding.  My sister wants me to design my outfit from one of the Villians from various Disney Movies, and the dress I’m thinking of will need for me to be very fit and my legs toned…Ooh La! La!  Now, here’s MY To-Do list for the Wedding:
      1. Make my sister’s Lasso – I got the design drawn, I need monetary approval from the parents, then I’ll have my blessing to work my magic!!
      2. Get framing options from Hobby Lobby for my sister’s Bridal Portrait, and give a surprise gift of their Engagement photo in a pretty frame.
      3. Work on the bride’s maids’ jewelry, basic prices, nothing too expensive.  I have the designs, I just need to finish Jasmine’s design, and then I’ll be in business!
      4. Lose Weight! Lose Weight! Lose Weight!
    2. Keep Organized: Another one of those things were EVERYONE makes this resolution, and EVERYONE breaks them!  I may have a moon in Virgo or something, because I cannot stand to have my room, or my life in an unorganized mess!  I don’t organize every aspect of my life, if I get the item done to day or tomorrow (depending on the item) then its done!  But I do need SOME structure and without teaching, I need that more than ever, or I’d be falling into the case of the Dulldrums ::insert Phantom Tollboothreference here::  I recently purchased a Moleskine journal from Barnes and Noble, and I got the 12-month Weekly Notebook with lines on the right hand side for list making.  I wasn’t sure if I needed the lists or not, but as of a week into this planner (the first week was December 26th – January 1st), I have made a full switch from my Day Runner Poetica planners to Moleskine.  Not only should I be organized on the daily life front, but monetarily, I downloaded some good checkbook and credit card programs to keep my monies in order for my phone.  Will this organization system work?  I hope so….

      12 months - Weekly Notebook - Black soft cover - Large

      This is the one I purchased from

    3. Craft Once a Week: Since I left Hobby Lobby, I’ve chosen a task for me to try, I will post one Crafty item on my blog.  Be it from another blog that I would like to try out, or from my own devious mind, I would like to craft!  From coloring everyday in grade school, to picking out clothes, and making Oboe reeds, clay sculptors and designing on the computer, I am a very handy person!  If it’s crafting for my sister’s wedding, or for personal use, I will post it on my blog.
    4. Apply, Apply, Apply!: I have made a list of places I need to apply at once school starts.  This will be done every day, for one school district and one Business.  Whomever calls first and offers me a job will be what I do until I have enough to move out….again.
    5. 30 Day Photography Challenge:  While this was started last year, I felt that this New Year could use some fun to start off with, and what better way than with one of my first loves, Photography.  It was a list started last year, and I thought it could be used to chronicle the first month of the new year.  I know I’m a few days late, but I figured better late than never!  Here’s the list of things that this Challenge will have, and I’ll post on Facebook and here for your viewing pleasure!

      Click the image to go to the blog site!

I hope everyone has had a good New Year! What are some of your resolutions for this year!



The Oracle of Dreams

Darkness Labyrinth

A Poem I Texted to the Boyfriend after a severe emotional breakdown a couple days ago. Sometimes writing helps sorts out my feelings, and gives me clarity in a time of need. The following was a free write in class the other day and it just seemed to make alot of sense.

I hurt,
I’m broken.
I don’t feel like there is a place for me in this world.

I cry,
I pray.
But no answers come.

The choice is mine,
But sometimes I can’t choose because of too many words in my head.
Telling me I can’t
Or they won’t hire,
Or you’re worthless.

Pain is all around me,
And I can’t shake it off.

Jest words sting.
And the Shields I used to have don’t work.
Everything stings.
Is there going to be a light at the end of the dark tunnel?
Or am I going to travel life in the Darkness Labyrinth.
No way out.
Full of pain.
Never Ending.

The Emotionally tired, Oracle of Dreams

Subbing 8/24/11

This was my first full day subbing and while it was bittersweet, seeing all my former students, I felt a bit upset at the fact that I couldn’t enlighten a new full group of students. My former students were a bit upset at that fact and proceeded to tell the principal in their own words how getting rid of me was the worst mistake ever…bless them!  In any case, getting back to the hectic-never-knowing-what-I’ll-have-next days again, but it was worth it.

First thing back to subbing and I’m already making mistakes…didn’t take roll, got on the computer to check email only to realize they deleted my account, and it wasn’t my class, so all this awkward what-should-i-do nonsense running through my head….I really want my classroom back.

The problem today was trying to teach English without going into a History Spiel about how Sandra Cisneros was basing her essays and characters off of experiences she had while she was a child and a lot of these experiences are from a time where being Mexican wasn’t a good thing.  In any case, they were confused on the subject, couldn’t figure out why the person couldn’t change her name because she didn’t like it.  The problem is they see people like Sean “Puffy, Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, Diddy, tra la la” Combs, and Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta aka “Lady Gaga” in their view sights, they couldn’t understand that changing your name was a significant dishonor to your parents, and in the case of Sandra Cisneros, your culture.  Again, over their heads.  But they got it when I explained to them how would their parent’s feel if they decided to change their given name to something else.

After that smooth sailing, but again it was hard to get back on the saddle after being destroyed emotionally over stupid State budget cuts, putting more people into unemployment, and thinking that the Governor can become President GRR!

The extremely, psychotically, irrationally angry-need-to-break-things, Oracle of Dreams

Back to School…. Back to School….

I was hoping that I would post some amazing summer vacation photos and such, but time got away from me.  I lost my teaching position to cut backs in the Texas State Government, spent all summer trying to obtain a position, and ended up working back at Hobby Lobby in the Framing Department, and re-applied as a Substitute Teacher in the Cypress-Fairbanks School District, and I’ll work part-time at night at Hobby Lobby to pay off a car I had purchased, because my trustworthy 1995 Honda Odyssey Van went to see St. Peterbuilt at the pearly garage gates in the sky.  I ended up purchasing a 2004 Toyota Matrix, and I couldn’t be happier with it.  It doesn’t need much work, but I am planning on doing some major engine and exterior remodeling on the car very soon (it’s so great to be dating a mechanic!!).

Michigan Trip 2011

My trip to Michigan was amazing, and I’ll plan on doing a post about that now that I’ll have some down time during classes to work on stuff like that.  I’ll talk about some amazing vintage stores, great foods, and of course my friends.  I’ll do this while watching the students do their busy work.  Yes, it sounds a bit lazy, but for the most part I’ll be subbing at my old school, and those kids’ listen to me…I hope….

Wedding 2012

Wedding 2012 Countdown begins as the school year starts, my sister’s wedding is in May, and we’re now starting the final countdown for floral arrangements, dresses, shoes, weight-loss, hair (if I have any left), dates, and surprise wedding festivities the boy and I are arranging with some friends of ours.  I’m on keyboards, The boy on lead guitar, our friend Jimmy on bass, and we still need a rhythm guitarist and a drummer, if you live in the Jersey Village area of Houston, Texas, and can play either instrument, just let me know.  You have to have an interest in all different types of music from Tejano to Indie Rock, we’re going to rock their socks off!  It’s a surprise, so don’t tell anyone!  I’ll keep you posted on the wedding details, the plans, the dresses, the weight-loss, the song list for surprise concert and any other tidbits of fun wedding related activities.  If all goes well, we may become a wedding band and do everything from Tex-Mex weddings to same-sex weddings to Klingon weddings.

A Paranormal Library

I spent all summer reading and listening to Podcasts.  I’m currently addicted to Jim Harold’s Paranormal Podcast, Campfire, Paranormal Report, and Weird News Radio.  I’m trying to save up for his Paranormal Plus club for the 79.95 price for a whole year…I hope I can get it.

Anyway, check him out, and while listening to his podcasts, he has authors and such come up  and give a premise on their books. From there, I’ve been stock piling numerous amounts of books that I have found, and I’ve been making my own paranormal reference library picking authors I like from the suggestions on the Paranormal Podcast, and either purchasing them at Half Price Books, or on my Nook, depending on the price of course!  In any case, Every Friday, I’ll pick one of these books to do a post on, and give my review of them, and others that I have found on my own.

Other podcasts I like are

Hometown Tales

Coast to Coast – there are some art bell classics updated on ITunes for free, other than that you do have to pay.

That’s the most of this update I’ll be doing, I’ll start posting everyday while I”m subbing, letting you guys know how it feels to go back to substitute teaching, the job search, everything that can possibly be me.

Dreamers, what are your back to school plans?

The Educational, Oracle of Dreams

Billy Madison Copyright 1995 Universal Pictures and Happy Madison Productions

16 Things I learned While Subbing – Parts 9 – 16

EXPO COLEX in Santos-Sao Paulo


Now for my final installment of things I learned while subbing.  These are mostly ideas that popped in my head as classroom management ideas when things started getting out of hand.  So these explanations are going to be small, if not just a couple of sentences, these options are just about how to keep life simple for the teacher. Sometimes the best way for classroom management is to bring stamps, stickers and candy…even in the High School Level.  

birthday balloons.9. Do give those with B-Days Recognition!

In High School, I resented the fact that I was not one of these “COOL Kids” who had a birthday during the school year, where I got nifty balloons and candy, cupcakes, and presents to tote around school for the whole day, being the princess.  Woe to my low self-esteem.  Now as a teacher I realized by allowing the recognition of a students birthday, no matter how small, is a great step in classroom management.  While I resented the fact that girls got balloons, I had always liked the teacher recognizing the birthdays in class, it was a nice gesture.  That hasn’t changed at all, the students listen better and respect the teacher.  Just Long-Term subbing and acknowledging birthdays made the classroom management better than classes where I didn’t.  Strange!


10. Do offer candy as a treat, prize, or Good Job!


Who wouldn’t do anything for candy (Also in sugar-free!).  For those who choose not to receive tasty sweet treats, I also offer my students snack options that range from Potato Chips to Goldfish (god bless Costco and Sam’s).  Seriously, need I say more?


245/365 - 4/2/2009

11. Do have decorations in the classroom!

I know most of us have been there, a teacher who was so dull, that all four walls of his/her (mostly his) classroom was the same stark white from when the school first opened.  While subbing, even I felt like a closet shut-in, wanting an escape from all the monotony, and stuffiness of a bare white-walled classroom.  You could see it in the students eyes too, they were bored out of their minds, they were coloring to bring some life into this classroom, and I felt sorry for them.  I also realized that teachers who did take time to create some semblance of a decorated classroom, had better classrooms in general as far as attitude went.  Again there are always exception to the rule, and it really depends on the personality of the student rather than the teacher or the classroom itself, I just noticed that a little effort went a long way.  Remember #5, the clean classroom rule?  These decorated classes had better management with mess than others!!!


12. Do at parent night, have parents sign a card themselves.

Self explanatory, since most parents try to have some contact with their child’s teacher, this idea only benefits the teacher since they have, at close hand, the student’s parental information, in case anything goes wrong.


The Ultimate School Folders

13. Do have an organized sub folder!

Geeze, this one was very personal, I cannot count how many times I had come into a classroom, where there was a sub folder with information in it from *GASP* two six weeks ago, but they were so disorganized that I couldn’t tell if their seating chart was up to date.  Worse yet, I’ve had teachers NOT LEAVE SUB PLANS AT ALL, and I had to pull out plans, along with other teachers, to fill up the whole class day!  I promised myself, and in my notebook, I even wrote “PROMISE YOU WILL NEVER DO THIS AT ALL” in the margins, with stars, exclamation points, and skull and crossbones.   I promised myself that my sub folder will contain up to date information, referrals (what sub cannot live without these), a sheet for a sub to write their notes on including an area to write their name with their sub ID# incase someone was very exceptional, and ALWAYS grade the work, I had assigned for the substitute, even if it doesn’t need grading!  How many times have I subbed and these little jerks always tell me that the teacher wont grade them, and I promised myself that would be the case.  I would also tell the sub NOT TO TRUST ANY OF THEM, THEY ALL LIE!


Ticket King Kohl Center seating chart

 14. Do have a seating chart!

This I learned from a Long-Term subbing assignment.  I had a class of talkers, and none of them would listen to me at all!!!!  THe seating chart was bogus, and they were so snotty, that they just laughed at me when I told them to move back.  I got the better of them, I stacked the chairs to one side of the room, and put their names on the floor and told them to sit on their name.  They thought it was a game and did so, then the next day the chairs were back, with their names on the chairs, again they thought it was a game, and then realized they were conditioned into sitting in their assigned seats, and if anyone tried to move back, ALL HELL WOULD BREAK LOOSE!  So, a seating chart was necessary.  Now!  I also had to install, a no excuse movement policy, if anyone tried to talk to their neighbor, they would be moved, no ifs ands or buts.  After two successful tries, they stopped.  Sadly that was at the end of my assignment, but at least the teacher got a friendlier class.


Scales of justice

15. Do TRY to be fair, the hate hypocrisy.

Back to rule #5, I have to be constantly rehydrating myself per doctors orders, so I never questioned the students eating or drinking in class, I just hate mess.  But it is not fair for me to sit there and tell them no food, when I’m sipping on water and eating a granola bar when my blood sugar lowers, they will resent that, and they would end up behaving worse if a teacher was going back on his/her rules.  Now, the same goes with the phone, I rarely have my phone out unless it’s absolutely necessary, and when that happens, the students are allowed a free phone day (Reference: My cat was in the hospital, having surgery to remove her cancer.  And they were to call if any complications arose, told my students what was happening, and they behaved with their phones).  This is also a matter of being consistent as well, if one students is talking, and you punish them, punish those others who are talking to them, or after them.  While I will never see ALL talking in class, these were the ones who were louder than most.  I know sometimes you have to go against the rules you state, but these kids are understanding, even if it takes them a while to think it.


Kitten meets dog through glass door

16. Do stand up for yourself, don’t let them bully you. Even if at times you don’t feel it, YOU ARE THE ADULT!

I would like to thank you for reading my lovely notes from subbing, with the prospects of subbing again, I hope that you at least learned something from all of this, or found real world applications as to why you need a seating chart.  If you found this amusing please comment, if not, just keep your comments to yourself :p.



The Soon to be Ex-Teacher, Oracle of Dreams

16 Things I learned While Subbing – Parts 1 – 8

For those Gleeks out there, everyone knows of the famous Holly Holiday, the awesome substitute of McKinnley High School, and the paramour of Mr. Will Schuster.  Miss Holiday seemed to be the essential substitute, trying everything in her power to get the students to listen and respect her, by bringing in real world (IE real to the students) applications to teaching as a substitute.  I will have to say, I, as a sub, had to bring in Lindsey Lohan into a discussion on the Great Gatsby, by using her as Myrtle, and Joe Jonas as Tom.

Before I got my start teaching, I spent two years subbing, and in those two years, I learned some very important lessons regarding teaching, and life as a whole.  While I’m looking at the grim expectancy of losing my job at the end of the year due to budget cuts, and the whole “Last one in–first one out” law, my chances are very slim in having a job next year.

While I try not to think of what is going to happen, but instead look at the positives, I happened across an old (not really old, I purchased it in January of 2010)  mini journal book filled with do’s and don’ts I recognized in the process of substituting for different teachers.  I also would like to acknowledge that from here on out, these rules were based on the single fact that you cannot trust teenagers, even-though some are very trust worthy and will not take you for granted, the majority of teenagers are sniveling little backstabbers that would sooner defy you than listen to you, and take advantage of a lenient restroom policy.  FYI teachers do get notices of students with bladder/stomach problems now, so if you bring that up, it’s just a moot point.  That idea has not changed since I started subbing…completely honest, teenagers haven’t changed…I just got a stiffer back bone.

A Moleskin Safari

1. Do take down student info.

While some of you may be scratching heads at this one, the fact is fairly simple.  As a substitute, the students, even though with revolutions in seating charts with the child’s face on it, will always try to pretend to be someone other than who they are.  Some will try to gain the substitute’s trust then squash it like yesterday’s left over gum.  While the teacher and substitutes try to thwart the ever-increasing problem of student behavior, having some tricks up your sleeve will work.  One I noticed in one teacher’s classroom, that I use to this day was to have, at the beginning of the school year, the student fill out two note cards, one with their name, student ID number, and House (if the school was separated into learning communities), and on the other, the same, but with their email, Facebook account, Twitter account, parent/guardian’s phone number, birthdate, address and zip code.  In the corner would be the period the student belongs to.  While as a substitute, I would never see the second note card, the teacher always left card one for me to view, with a nice cut out of the students face.  This was to help the sub figure out who was the problematic student, and write the referral for the AP’s discretion.  The second one is only used by the teacher to make calls or emails to the student or their parent/guardian in an effort to control problematic behavior.  The Facebook and Twitter will come next.

Facebook/Twitter Icon

2. Do set up Twitter and Facebook accounts for postings of school work.

In the age where someone can post an image on Facebook, or say something offensive on twitter and subsequently lose their jobs (*Cough* Gilbert Godfrey), these applications can help in a teaching situation.  I noticed one simple thing while substituting, the students are either, A) Texting on their phone while pretending to be listening to class, or B) texting on Facebook/Twitter while pretending to be listening to class.  For a teacher of the modern world, your phone is a great portal to the outside world.  Facebook and Twitter are at the tip of your fingers, and some school districts are also allowing access for teachers to this great tool.  Students are always either on their phone or their computer, and a great majority of students will be on either Facebook or Twitter, therefore in theory, they have no excuse to go to a class-oriented page and look up their homework or test for the next day if it is posted on Facebook.  Many students in my perspective have appreciated this aspect of my classroom, since I post class work on the page and take it down after a week.  I also have a class calendar on it as well, along with updates to my students on tests and project due dates.  Of course common sense is not to post photos of my students or myself on this page, but I did make a snazzy class identity for students to know who I am on Facebook.

Studio 6: Desk

3. Do TRY, TRY, TRY to be organized!!!

This application translates into every day living, it also translates into teaching.  I have subbed for some of the cleanest teachers, and some of the most messy teachers to where they couldn’t find the work I left for them that day on their desk.  It does get bad, and not only that, I do stand by the old proverb “Cleanliness is next to godliness.”   It is hard as a substitute and a teacher to work in constant mess, and at times I would stay till six in the afternoon just to clean off the mess on my desk.  My own office is almost godlike, in organization, as my closet it, as you have seen from some photographs, but a lot of the organization came with time and effort on my part.  But as a teacher, it is highly possible to lose work on a messy desk, that’s why I redid my entire classroom the second six weeks of class to prevent the need of constantly fighting my messiness, and ended up with an organizer (from the Container Store no less), for my entire week.  I also bring my students in to grab their work that has already been graded to prevent clutter.  It’s all about training the students!


4. Do Not be responsible for lost pages.

This is one that I have to explain, and it kind of goes with organization.  See, in subbing and teaching, students have a tendency to lose their work, be it turned in the next week, the next day, or the next minute, students will lose their work.  What I’ve done to remedy this is to start a notebook, in which I place page numbers on all notes, worksheets, and book work, and have a notebook test to test what they have.  While in theory this is supposed to prevent the loss of work, I will admit that these students can lose their heads, if they weren’t attached to their cell phones and I do have students who fail the notebook test due to them not really wanting to take care of their notebook in the first place.  While long-term subbing, I had a class that everyday would ask me for work that they lossed and it bothered me to no end, so the notebook system came up, and that seemed to prevent the loss of work.  It really bothered me that they were unable to take responsibility for their own actions and neglect the responsibilities for school work.  I can say that at times I will have less than 5 students who do not turn in their work, but that was a hard road to challenge, and it is something I still struggle/work with to this day.


5. Do Not Allow students to keep the classroom dirty!

For those who remember the whole  “You cannot eat in the classroom” bit, the rules have changed, students hate that they cannot eat every single moment of the day, and will hide food in their bags to prevent this rule.  So some teachers have accommodated this a bit, and they do allow the students to eat in the classroom, the problem is that some teachers will be good about making the students clean the classroom of their mess, while others struggle with the students inability to clean up after themselves.  Some students are even so bad as to say “Its the custodian’s job to clean up after me.”  That may be, but it’s not polite, or sanitary to have five other classes to sift through your mess just to get the janitor to clean up after you.  My thing is sanitation, its disgusting for me to go through piles of used milk cartons, half eaten pizzas and apples, and left over ice cream wrappers, to make me realize that my students are slobs.  I remedied that.  After weeks of trial and error, I started showing my students what the whole place looks like after a week of not allowing the janitor to clean my classroom.  They got the point almost immediately, and constant nagging also helped as well.  Now I have a clean classroom, and the students are not eating as much in class.


 6. Do not allow students to have phones/mp3’s out for ANY REASON unless given permission.

While the obvious answer to this question is “DO NOT ALLOW THEM PERIOD”, it is a losing battle regarding phones and teenagers.  Unless there is legislation making it illegal for ANYONE to have a phone on school premises, this problem will not remedy itself.  For some teachers, they’ve used this problem into a solution, by integrating the technology into classroom learning.  I myself use the phone as a means of students to look up information for a focus and reward them for the treat.  Then class starts and phones are put away, I still have problems, and I don’t think they’ll ever be completely resolved, but I do have students listening to me at least.  What I have noticed is that mp3 can be used as nifty treats for students who are working on busy work.  By busy work, I mean the worksheet, or research to a lesson at hand that they can listen to music without being interrupted, this does alleviate classroom chitchat and enhances a group work environment, and I also use it as a treat after a test.  I guess the lesson here, is not to fight it, embrace the techno culture, and realize that these kids have an electronic addiction, one only remedied for them to realize that technology itself is not needed to satisfy life.

Charmin Restrooms - (85/2584)

7. Do not let them pile on to go to the restroom.

As a substitute, this was a problem, students were always asking me to go to the restroom once the period started, many were in fact not coming back once allowed to use the restroom.  This ruined the privileges to others who definitely asked to use the restroom.  So as a sub, I started the policy of no one is allowed to go to the restroom unless the person going comes back.  So if the student goes to the vending machines, then all privileges and food to the restroom are losed for the entire class.  As a teacher I have implemented the idea that no one in class is allowed to use the restroom until they finish their work.  This also alleviates constant restroom complaints, and I don’t have an interrupted class.  I know some of you are thinking about the students who do have problems, and need to use the restroom, I as a sub and a teacher are given information regarding the state of students, some teachers even write down names of in need students, so I know who to allow and who not to.  It’s not so bad either, because those students are the ones who DON’T abuse the restroom privileges.   It’s a matter of trusting the students to do the right thing, and punishing the whole to get the point across, it is also knowledge and trying to outsmart them at every turn.

Emmet Gowin at Doylestown Photography Club

8. Do Always have a power point-set up at the beginning of class.

This came after a long-term assignment.  The kids were always getting confused at the end of the period, trying to figure out what they were doing for the day, what the homework was, etc.  So I started setting up power points that allowed the students to see what the days work was going to be, before, during and at the end of  class.  This PowerPoint had the day listed at the top, the Objective for the day, the chronological order the class will go in, nifty trivia regarding the lesson at hand (random trivia for test and quizzes), and the students birthday’s for the day!  It really helped class morale, they enjoyed the fact that I acknowledged their birthday, and even other classes were amused at what I was doing, especially the other teacher’s class.  This also helped classroom management, because they knew exactly what was expected of them, and the loss of Birthday privileges on the PowerPoint.  I love self-absorbed teenagers!

This is it for now, I hope you enjoyed these interesting tidbits of my experiences while subbing.  If you’re offended in any way, just look at some of the teenagers out there, and realize that I teach in public school, I have to do some serious training to get some of these kids to listen to me, and respect me since I haven’t aged since I was 16.


The Teaching Obsessed Oracle of Dreams

Fat Like Me…

For the last few weeks, I have been dealing with the impending death of my cat Cletus, and as a result, I’ve been stress eating and have been too depressed to work out.  To my dismay today, as I put on my favorite slacks for class I realized that not only did they not fit around my waist, they gave me camel toe!!! EEEK!

What worries me more is that I’m headed to Michigan on Wednesday, and I feel like I’m not going to fit any of the clothes I tried to pack.  What I”m going to do for the next few days is a rigorous amount of exercising, and dieting, nothing too severe, just enough to bring me back from what I was last week.

For the majority of my life, I was always on the slim side, I could eat whatever I wanted, and not gain weight.  I thought it was awesome, and ignored the signs that were glooming at me.  For one, I noticed that on one side of the family, the women were trim, sometimes on the verge of skinny, while on the other, the women gained weight at the drop of a hat.

My problem with weight began when I was in high school.  I was accepted into the Barbizon School of Modeling, and I was very pleased with myself, I worked out in Marching Band, and was an active high school-er, and fit into a trim size 2.  While there, they kept telling me I was heavy, sure I had baby fat, but I always assumed that it would eventually taper off as I got older.  I had some friends who criticized me for being a model and having tummy fat, and saying that I was too fat to model.  My self-esteem at the time was so low, that I felt fat, and spent a year, trying to control the weight gain and loss I experienced through my disastrous food problem (or as I saw it).

When I got to college, I was walking everywhere, I was feeling fit, I worked out, and I still ate like a frat boy on payday, but then I was also drinking alcohol, and I still had my little tummy pooch as I called it.  But being with my group of friends, they encouraged me to love myself for who I was, but when I would get home from school, my boyfriend’s mother and my mother would always point out the extra weight I had gained in college.  While it was of no concern with me moving from a 5 at the end of high school to a 7 after my sophomore year in college, and supposed that on my ever-increasing hips, I come from a very hip oriented family.

By the time my senior year in college came, I was bordering on a size 10, my self-esteem was shot to hell, and I was looking for a reason to lose weight.  I enrolled in a hip hop class, drove my car to school, but parked it from the furthest spot possible, and walked to the majority of my classes and took the stairs.  That helped me move from a 10-ish back to a 9, but I needed to do more, what helped was that I was also working in a warehouse, and I was able to trim back about 10 pounds, and then I ended up working out after my hip hop class and that brought me back to a 7 for the rest of my senior year, even after I only had one class left the spring semester, I just worked out more, and ate better, mostly pastas, salads, lean beef and pork, more chicken, and yogurt, were all I could afford and it did wonders, my doctor told me I was in great health.

When I moved back home after college, I still stayed trim but most of that was from a serious depression, where I barely ate, couldn’t do anything but play video games and not much else, I stayed at a 7, and realized that it was more of out of my body shape, and not much else.  I was happy in my size 7, and proceeded to work at an Adult Novelty Store, since it was the only job offered to me at the time.  There, the fast food binge came, everyday for every meal (which would be two meals Breakfast and Lunch, or Lunch and Dinner).  I met Donald at that time too, so I was happy again, and Donald and I started our eat outs, pizzas and such, and my weight slowly started to creep back up.  I tried running, working out, and eat less, but the fact I was happy and that I could now easily get bored, I started eating in between meals, snacking, and drinking more and more Dr. Pepper, to the point I could possibly have a blood transfusion from Dr. Pepper alone.  That and I love salt…absolutely love salt.

My self-esteem started to waver, I started to feel sorry for myself, and I tried everything I could to stop my overeating, and I was able to halt myself at a size 9.  For about three years, I grew comfortable with my 9 status, and looked fit enough for people to not realize that I was a 9 anyway, I would rip tags off my clothes because the numbers would make me depressed, but I looked good and healthy, I was always a healthy person, even after starting Hobby Lobby, I stayed at a 9.  It wasn’t until this past year that my weight began to surge into 10 status…double digits…it started to effect my style choices.  Clothes that hit my tummy, long sweaters that hid my tummy, pants that cinched my tummy.  I was a modern enough woman to realize that pant size wasn’t what made me feel loved, isn’t want made me feel accepted, but the more I looked at the double-digit number, the more I began to fear me becoming what I most dreaded…my cousins.  They are in the size 18-20 areas and call me fat or go around behind my back and call me pregnant, because I could not get clothes fast enough to hide my ever-increasing pant size.

via flickr

Out of fear, I went to the Gyno and got a pregnancy test, because weight increase like this, had to have been due to a pregnancy…no not pregnant.  Then I thought, maybe I have a thyroid problem, so I get blood work done (without insurance btw) and no, no thyroid problems.  I couldn’t figure out what this increase was, eating healthy was my mantra, and I reduced Dr. Pepper intake to once a day to fulfill my needs for caffeine addiction.

Most of this comes from the fact that I shouldn’t have my self-esteem based on how much I weighed, but I do.  I feel at times I’m the most enlightened woman there is, and then I doubt that because I feel like my teeth are not white enough, I’m still breaking out like a teenager, or my weight is spiraling out of control.  I shouldn’t have these vanity ideas as a reason behind me being self-conscious, but I am.  I have taken measures to see this out, but my cat dying (which is no reason in and of itself) and stress about loosing my job due to budget cutbacks and put my self-esteem in a downward spiral, moving farther and farther into depression a dark place I never wanted to be back in.

Dreamers, have you ever felt the same way, that your size is a definition of who you are as a person.  Have you ever felt that vanity reasons are reasons enough for you to hate yourself even more?


The self-obsessed Oracle of Dreams

My Life, My Way, No Need for Children

To preface this post with another, I have to say that the majority of this current post is based on the incredibly written post of Gala Darling.  To paraphrase the post, it was an advice post based on the most appropriate way to address the incivility or ignorance of people who question those who choose not to have children.

I too have that same problem, I come from a LARGE family on both sides: My father’s side contains 3 uncles and 3 aunts, 7 siblings total; My mother’s side contains 6 Uncles and 6 aunts, Technically it is 5 uncles since one has passed on, but you get the general idea.  When my grandfather on my mother’s side died back in 2001-ish, I cannot remember, He had over 32 Grandchildren (Including my brother, sister and I) and 15 Great-Grandchildren which has gotten exponentially greater since my teenage cousins have started reproducing.  While I do sound cynical in all of this, it is mostly based off the fact that I cannot go to any party, be it a wedding, Easter, or a Funeral without being bombarded by the question:

“When are you and Donald going to get married and have children?”

And the answer to marriage has always been the same, “When the finances come in and we can individually pay for the wedding, we’ll have one”–God forbid we’re living in sin! According to my Aunt– and to the children one: “We plan on not having children.”

The wedding one causes its own type of controversy but the child question always brings up the other argument: “You’re disappointing your parents.”

While I have been living a lifestyle contrary to what my parents have wanted for me, I have always been my own person, my mother has gotten used to the idea that I will not wear a thousand dollar wedding dress, or wear white (How bout bright lime green or bright Mauve!), or have the wedding in a church (I’m Agnostic and the boyfriend is Atheist–House of Blues Peacock Room Wedding All the Way with Amanda Palmer as the House Band!!!).  She has acknowledged that I like to wear makeup so bright that I blind people, and that I will never conform to her standards of what proper living should be, and I listen to Amanda Palmer who is not her idea of an idol.

She accepts me for all of these things, but the only problem we get into is Children.  She comes from a standpoint that everyone needs to procreate and have children, I on the other had believe that having children and teaching may cause me to go super-duper insane and somehow either get put away for insanity or burn my house down!  That and working retail 10+ years has shown me that I really have no patience for children at all, which is why I ended up becoming a High School Teacher, I may be raising children, at least they know how to potty in a toilet….at least I HOPE they do!  Not only that, my mother should know as well as I that having Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome is a shot in the dark that will either produce healthy children, or loose your ability to have them at all.  I decided not to try to have children based off the fact that I have seen what a hysterectomy has done to my mother, and not having children is the best way to avoid an unplanned hysterectomy in the first place.  She ended up with both PCOS and Endometriosis from having my brother, sister and I, and many of that was from her not having money to be checked by a proper gynecologist until after she had me, my brother and sister. I also realized that most of my problems at that time of the month imitate hers when she was my age, so from a medical standpoint I say no to children.

From my personal philosophy standpoint I also say no.  I have been a teacher for several years now, and I spend a great deal of time volunteering at my mother’s school with her first graders.  I’m known as “Maestra Mala” or “Mean Teacher” because I have little to no tolerance for 25+ small 7 year olds in a small room running around on a sugar bender after lunch.  I can barely stand my 4th period 10th grade class after lunch, but they know my rules, these small ones don’t, and it’s not my classroom, so I shut my mouth and make sure that they at least do not kill each other.


Children to me seem like a great idea for some, and a horrible idea for others, my boyfriend and I love children, we love playing with them, holding them, taking the for walks, and all that jazz, but as great parents we would probably make, the possibility of us having children are very slim, for medical and personal reasons.  We’re not grown-up enough to have children, having most of our doors in our room locked because of the fact we collect vintage action figures and religious artifacts, video games and movies, and the fact that we are self-proclaimed Ferret Parents who understand the possibilities and dangers of having infants/toddlers around ferrets at the same time.  Having one fluffy 2-year-old and a human 2-year-old in the same house is mental suicide!  Also, we prefer ferrets anyway, they rarely cry, they may get into everything, but after the 6 year mark, they have less of a chance to back talk to you than a human child.

My boyfriend and I are also realists though, we’ve been planning for the unknown possibilities for years now.  What happens if we end up conceiving, Abortion Yes, Abortion No? Adoption, Closed or Open? Or Keeping the child?  While both of us are Pro-Choice, neither of us would prefer the abortion option, we can barely put down our animals without feeling guilty, and its our mess we have to see it through to the end, but neither of us would want to send the child out for adoption (Our ferret was a foster case who ended up staying with us, full term pregnancy then adoption would be out of the question), so we decided that the option for us was to keep the future child, more because conception happened and lets take it to the extreme.  We’re reasonable people if a child happens through all the protection we’re taking, then obviously the child was meant to be with us.  The other thing too, we’re stubborn, and take challenges head on, and rarely back out of a fight.

The way we see it, we may want to be a childless couple but we’re adult enough to realize that this child is coming to a home that it will be loved and cherished.

To add more to this story, we’re also Guardians for our friend’s children as well…last time I counted 5 children are in our guardianship and most of this was because our friends recognize us as responsible adults who do love kids and will take care of them and love them, no questions asked.  I do not wish any ill will on our friends, but watch the boyfriend and I have 5 children who are not ours!

I do not question that sometimes accidents happen, but my plans are to where I want to get my PHD, I want to start teaching college, I want to work at the Sorbonne (If I can learn French), or work in the BAU of the FBI, there’s so many things I want in my life, that children are no where in sight for me at this time.  After my first novel hits it big on the big screen, and I win an Oscar for Acting and Screenwriting, MAAAYBE I’ll think about having children, till then, my choice my rules.  I even get questioned from my students about this, even ones who do have children,  and I always tell them, “My students are the only children I will ever need!”  If I could post the pictures on here, I have so many pictures of my students children, from their first picture to year three that I even get emails of 5 year olds with captions saying “Watch out Miss C, you’re getting another one of me VERRY SOON!”

My family has always been traditional, I have lived my life with nothing but being a non-traditionalist who prefers other things than most.  I look at my brother and sister and notice that they can do things with their lives in any which way they want, and I know my parents will always compare me to my brother and sister, but I live the way I want to live.  My parents love me enough to realize that children are really not my thing, and while I love playing with babies and babysitting, teaching those who wish not to be taught, and I know that I can go home and relax with a glass of wine without having to worry about another small person.  You should see the boyfriend when he’s in a toy store, I had to pull him away from two 10 year olds with Nerf guns because all three of them were in an all out Metal Gear Solid battle at FAO Schwartz with my boyfriend wearing a red bandanna and crawling on the ground!   Who says my boyfriend doesn’t like kids, he’s a big kid himself!  He even told me that if we do end up having children, he wants a little girl so she can be the meanest, toughest, girly tomboy around!  I laugh cause I know with our luck and Karma, our daughter would want to be in pageants and be the princess, not the awesome rock stars her parents are! 😀

via Anne Geddes

My other reasons are purely familial.  I come from a family who wishes to talk about sex as if it is nothing but taboo, which is why both sides of my family have teenagers becoming, or getting their girlfriends pregnant.  It’s not that it is taboo, but they’re too afraid to even talk about sex with each other, and I see the problems these unplanned pregnancies have on my cousins and their partners and their children involved.  I know the children are loved, but you can see it in their eyes that they did not want this for their lives, and I see that and I don’t want to become that.  The problem I also see is that my teenage cousins don’t even want to talk to their children about sex either, and take the stance “They need to learn it themselves” but in my view that causes more problems than solves.  If each of us takes the time to sit down with our children, and talk about the options that are out there, then maybe we’ll have fewer people regretting having children.   I never got those options with my parents being conservative liberals, but they are starting to realize that I may not have that motherhood instinct, and animals are the best way for me to go, but they won’t realize it until they see it.

What gets me is that people start going on about how I am a horrible person for not wanting children. I am not a horrible person, I am just a person who sees her life and her options far better than many who don’t want children, or who do.  I spent years looking at my family to realize that I am in no way fit to be a mother.  Maybe my family scarred me from every being a mom, maybe I looked too hard, but I see those eyes, those zombie eyes of family members who used to be just like me, tell me I’m missing out when I know they’re miserable.  I see my family taking their aggression out on their children, those who are fat, need braces, or are told that they are ugly as sin and won’t do anything to help them feel better about themselves, yet I am the one who gets told that I am selfish.  I’m not, and I don’t appreciate being called that when I have your children coming to me for advice, because they are cutting themselves because my cousins are telling them that they’re ugly, or are getting drunk every-night blaming the kids on their horribly misshapen bodies.  I get told things that they are too ashamed to tell their parents, because I do not judge, yell or question their motives, I listen.  I get asked about sex all the time from my teenage second-cousins because all they get from their parents is “Don’t Do It.”   Those with worse problems, I take them to their school guidance counselor, or email the counselor myself, and have some one on one with a professional who can help them.  I’m also the person who tells them that they are the most beautiful things in the world, that maybe they were not planned but there are people who do love them, and if things do get bad, Cousin Oracle is not that far away and will come pick you up.  I see and do all this and yet I am told by these same transgressors that I am selfish, or fat.

I in no way want to discourage people from not having children, these are only my opinions, and yet not many people realize that NOT having a child is an option.  I have yet to meet a childless couple who did feel lonely or that their life was incomplete, my boyfriend and I feel very fulfilled in our lives as we strive to create a lifestyle for ourselves.  You don’t have to have a child just to keep a husband, I like referencing Drop Dead Fred when someone tells me this, even though it is fiction, I do see in real life what some people do to their children when they realize that they had a child just to keep a husband, they’re in a loveless relationship, too afraid to divorce because of familial standards, and the fact that they don’t want to raise a child alone.  Societal pressure is also filled with the ideology that we as women HAVE to get married at a young age, HAVE to have children, and be happy from it.  We all have choices, if you don’t want children, then don’t have any, or if you try to picture yourself having children, and all you see are dogs and ferrets, then don’t have children, but…

always keep your mind open and start thinking of the options you do have, planning always helps, but never assume that having children will be easy, it is a constant struggle, just like it is a constant struggle in getting my ferrets to potty in the litter box and not on the floor.

Looking back at my teenage cousins and their children and their relationships right now, I noticed that they are not happy, I even have a cousin whose girlfriend is leaving him behind with their two sons, because she cannot take the life of a mother, and has come out saying that she only got pregnant to keep him from having another girlfriend in college.  I don’t even know what to say about this, since I have never felt that insecure about someone to the extent of wanting children.  I don’t even know if I could leave my kids behind, but since men do it all the time, why not women, maybe with women leaving their families, a dialogue of whether or not having children can come up without all of us looking like selfish people.  I’m not a selfish person, I do spend time at Women and Children shelters helping out, I do spend time fostering animals, and having the neighborhood kids coming to help, educating them about the responsibilities of having animals.

The plain simple truth is, I like kids, I just don’t want any of my own.

Dreamers, what are your choices regarding Children, do you want any, not want any, what kind of plans do you have set?


The Childless Oracle of Dreams

P.S. I got some really great articles from Gala Darling’s page that opened my eyes into doing this post.

I Cannot Handle Being A Mother Anymore

ChildFree Blog



While I try to be cheery in these posts, the past couple of days has been completely horrible.  I just found out that I have to put my cat down due to a serious illness.  I’m not in the best of shape, and I may not post for several days depending on how I take the situation.  We set the date for Thursday, and I may not post on Friday, I haven’t been in the writing mood for a while. My family and I are spending our last few days with my cat and we’re having the doctor come to our house to put her down in a comfortable and familiar place.

As I write this, I’m crying, it won’t stop and I’ve had to miss school on Monday because I was just in shock from the news.  I have raised her since she was a baby, we found her in a ditch with her two brothers and sister after a major storm.  Her sister drowned, and her and her brothers were covered in fleas and ants, all of them several days old. 

My cat is 12 years old now, who had social problems with people and isolated herself for 6 years in my parents bedroom.  She was fine until her cancer came back and started effecting her blood stream.   I have another cat, but its hard loosing one you’ve had forever, even though my other cat is like my child, it hurts way too much that this one is going.  I may even skip my Retro Thursday movie since I’m feeling horrible, and I may not be in the best mood.  I haven’t even seen the boyfriend since last Saturday morning, and I may not see him this weekend, I’m really sorry for the depressed mood this post is bringing, but its hard losing a pet that you have grown so close to.  I can’t even teach the students without wanting to cry.  I hope I’ll be better, but this is just a warning if you come by and see that I’m not around.


The Depressed and Grieving Oracle of Dreams